Ugh it's so cold. It frosted outside last night and we couldn't turn our heater on. Needless to say the house is cold. What I wouldn't give for some California summer weather right now. Floating carelessly in Lake Siskiyou watching the clouds float by.

Don't get me wrong. I kinda like it here. It's not like in Mordor where it's miserable year round. It's just my problem with it is I love outdoor activity and there's not much to be had here. No swimming, places to hike, or even camp within miles. Sometimes solitude in the wilderness is what I need to get my head straight. I don't think that's possible here.

My wife spoke to her mom last night. Broke the bad news to her. She was naturally upset because she had plans to move here next month. I know my sweetie was looking forward to that. Anyway, I guess now she's staying in Florida which greatly limits our plans. I had thought about going to California on my own to get a job and bring the family out. Now, I don't know what we're gonna do.

Speaking of my wife, she does amaze me sometimes. I certainly do not deserve her. She is very understanding and defends me through this whole thing. She doesn't deserve a life like this. She needs someplace warm and stable. Yet, I guess I'm just not man enough to give her these things. I feel like the whole world in it's greed and selfishness stands against us.