I'm more than a little shook up today... My Dad called me from Southern California to tell me he just got out of ICU after having a heart attack. As far as I know this is the first time he's had something like this happen. I don't know how bad the attack was but I imagine it was pretty bad. I guess he's coming home soon. I'll find out more then. I do know that I'm going to have to take a much more active role in helping him in the future.

I know I've said alot of bad things about my Dad in the past. And for many years I've borne a tremendous grudge against him. But, this kind of thing makes it easy to forget about such things. I realized when my Mom died in 2000 that he was the only parent I really had left in the world. It is a bit scary facing the prospect of being alone in the world. True, my Dad has never done much to help me. But, to not have the morale support is the worst thing.

In other news, we've been getting lucky lately. The local drug store has been remodeling and they are selling off some of their old display cases. So far we've picked up two glass cases and a large magazine rack for our store. As I said before it's the little things that add up that makes us at least feel like we're getting closer to opening our store. I just hope the momentum keeps up.

It's still cold... and I'm still sick. Life hasn't been going well lately.

First, the guy I'm buying my 1861 Springfield rifled musket from says I'm not paying him fast enough and wants it back. A few months back we came up with a contract that would give me until Oct 15th to pay it off. I don't know what he is thinking. I've tried to call him and go by his office but he's never there. Tonight I'm gonna write him a letter in an attempt to talk some sense into him.

Second, I wasn't feeling well today and a little short on cash so I didn't go to my daughters Volleyball game. So of course she comes home and pitches a fit saying I never do anything for her. I got mad and fired back at her... So right now we're not talking to each other. She gets this concept of what family life should be like from watching sitcoms on Nickelodeon. I know this because I listen to those same shows and get mad. She is just in her own little world and has no regard for the feelings of anyone else.

Third, I've been feeling lately like my whole life is just sitting on hold. All my thoughts and focus are on the business yet, I have to deal with little stuff that keeps getting in the way. It frustrates me alot to have no money but a burning ambition and a plan to succeed. I'm just waiting for my settlement money to get things going. Of course, the damned insurance company is going to drag their heels for as long as they can just to make me miserable.

I guess I just need to start painting again. That does alot to curb my frustration and relieve stress. Of course, I don't have much left to paint. When I run out what will I do?

Ugh... it was cold here today. The shivering and huddling up in blankets served to remind me that I need to get wood for the coming winter. However, I still don't know if we're going to have an income next month. I'm waiting until Tuesday to see if I get a check from the insurance company. If not, I'll apply for State Disability or Unemployment. I have to pay the bills a few more months so I can get money to start our business. I just know that when we launch it we're going to be doing well.

Yesterday we all went to the local fish hatchery for another "kids fishing day". This time everyone pulled in our limit of fish which amounts to 18 trout and one bass. While fishing for John, I managed to pull in a good sized trout. I felt kinda bad because I was using my Armenian friend's pole at the time. Later in the evening we all got together for a great big fish fry. Everyone had a great time.

I think the reason we did so much better fishing this time is because my darling wife was there. She is like a beacon of tranquility and reassurance for both me and the kids. I am so blessed to have her in my life. I don't think I would do very well without her.