So, I am sitting here late at night listening to old SCA music. Folky type tunes with an SCA theme. I am reflecting on my time in the SCA and everyone I have met there. The good times and the very bad times. I'm sad to say that the bad times and anguish are more numerous then the good times. This mostly stems from the people I used to associate with in Society. No, its not some "fringe" group like some would think, they were definately more mainstream but, they were just bad people. I have a small group of good people that I know and cherish that are still there. But, i feel like I am under the shadow of this former group. Like everyone will associate me with them forever, as people often do.
Enough said about that, it stirs some bad feelings...
I have swine flu. I caught it last week and have been suffering from it since. I can see for sure how this virus can kill people. There were a few times in the past few days that I saw my own mortality. Specifically, it is hard to breathe. I woke up in a panic a few times feeling like I was suffocating. I am on the upswing of this but it is a slow recovery.
My mother-in-law is staying with us. If you would have asked me a year ago what that would have been like I would have summed it up in one statement, "hell on earth". But, I have to say that this is a very different experience. In fact, I am rather enjoying her company. What I am most happy about is seeing my children interact with their grandmother. I had very little exposure to my own grandparents, and I think that they are an important part of a childs life. I can also see in her how they have brought some happiness into her life. Also, and most important, she has been a tremendous help to the household, and is very much appreciated. Especially in this time of me being so sick.
Blessings come in some very strange and unexpected ways sometimes.
